


does my love make your head spin?

by domharry1994



Category: One Direction
Genre: Abusive Zayn, Angry Zayn, Bit of Fluff, Counselor - Freeform, Counselor liam, Cute, Cutting, Daddy Kink, Dark, Eating out, Fuck everyones hurt, Harry and louis are so cute in this, Hospital, Hurt Harry, Hurt Liam, Hurt Louis, Hurt Zayn, Insecure Louis, Insecurity, Jealousy, M/M, Mental Institution, Mentions of Suicide, One Shot, Penetration, Porn With Plot, Sad Harry, Sad Louis, Self Harm, Smut, Swearing, Therapy, This still needs a lotttt of editing, Yelling, abusive, asshole zayn, attempted suicide, domestic abuse, girl louis, mention of selfharm, possessive, protective, trigger - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-22
Updated: 2016-09-06
Packaged: 2018-08-10 08:10:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,351
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7837042
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/domharry1994/pseuds/domharry1994
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>just another mental institution fic</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> yay my first time writing a mental institution fic, it's kinda all over the place but don't worry I'm planning on fixing it up tonight, things it doesn't include right now is Harry attempted to kill himself by drinking bleach and that's why he was admitted, and the fic is suppose to open up with smut but when I was first writing this Louis was a boy and than I decided to make Louis a girl, hope you enjoy! Took me only 3 days :)

Harry woke up with a gasp, he gaped as he looked down at his girlfriend who winked as she bounced on his cock, throwing her head back in a moan as his cock rubbed against her clit each rub.

"Fuck daddy," she moaned, Harrys eyes went black and he wasted no time in flipped them over. He thrusted hard, hitting her g spot each thrust. 

"Does daddy make his girl feel good?" His rough voice asked, he pulled her hair when she didn't answer.

"Yes daddy, feel so good." She nearly screamed, wrapping her legs around his waist as she creamed on his dick. He came as well and pulled out, his chest heaving as he laid next to her. 

She surprised him when she slid between his legs and plopped his sensitive dick in his mouth. 

Who cares if they're late to group therapy.  
********

The seats slowly filled in as the clock ticked to eight o'clock, the time group therapy was held at. The counselor, Liam, took a seat at the head chair and greeted each patient that arrived. 

"Morning Zayn, Morning Perrie," liam said warmly to the couple, Perrie smiled slightly but Zayn ignored him and grabbed Perrie's wrist tightly, she winced as he led her to their usual spot. Liam lightly shook his head at that. 

He continued to greet each patient until almost each seat was full except Harry and Louis's, but they were usually late. 

"Morning everyone!" Liam said with a big smile, "hope everyone had a good night last night-" liam was interrupted by giggling coming from the entrance, he rolled his eyes as he saw it was Louis and Harry whom looked completely sexed out. 

"Sorry we're late," Louis giggled, her long brown hair looking as if someone (harry) was grabbing at it, her collarbones bright red with hickies. 

 

"It's fine guys, have a seat." Liam said, rolling his eyes. Harry sat down on the last available chair and Louis happily sat on his lap. Louis has never sat in her chair and Liam has never tried to make her. 

"Alright great, everyone is here," liam clapped his hands together, "today we're going to watch a five minute clip and than we're going to say how it makes us feel," liam said to the group, he looked over at Perrie and Zayn and sighed when he noticed she was digging her nails into her wrists as Zayn whispered into her ear. 

"Zayn, Perrie, in the hall please," Perrie and Zayns head shot up, Perrie pulled down her sleeve and they both made their way out. The group ooed immaturely. 

Liam shut the door behind them and looked at Perrie who had a guilty experission on her face and Zayn whose face showed no emotion. Liam sighed and pulled Perrie's sleeve up, revealing the bright red nail marks. She bit her lip and kept her gaze on the ground as Zayn shot her an angry look.

"Are you fucking serious Perrie? Why are you doing this? Do you think this is fucking cute? If you don't stop I'm going to.." Zayn clenched his fists and that's when Liam stepped in. 

"Zayn, stop. There's your problem right there. Yelling at her, and "punishing" her does not help her. Makes her want to hurt herself more," liam tried to explain, Zayn grumbled.

"I just get so mad, I don't want to see her hurt herself," he said quietly, a light blush covered his cheeks. Perrie smiled slightly and kissed his cheek, "Why don't you just tell me that babe instead of hurting me?" 

Zayn shrugged, Liam looked over to Perrie. "When I looked over at you Perrie, Zayn seemed to be whispering something in your ear that had made you hurt yourself. What was he saying?" 

Zayn looked guilty and Perrie gave Liam a sad look, "he um, he said," Perrie's eyes filled with tears, "he told me he hates me and how I'm tying him down. How I'm ugly and f-fat." Perrie cried, her nails once again raking down her wrists, Zayn grabbed her hand.

"Stop baby, please stop." Zayn pleaded, his voice cracking. "I love you, I love you, and I love only you, I wish I could express it without hurting you, or," Zayn lightly ran his fingers down the deep nail marks, "making you hurt yourself. But I will always love you. And you aren't fat, and holy fuck you aren't ugly," Tears were streaming down Perrie's cheeks, Liam quietly went back on the room to give them some privacy.

"You are so beautiful it makes my head spin, I look at you and I just admire my gorgeous baby. Don't believe me when I say those things, I don't mean them. But i do mean this, I love you, baby." 

Perrie was crying hysterically and sat on the floor, her knees curling into her chest as she struggled to breath. Zayn wrapped his arms around her and kissed her temple. 

"That's all I ever needed to hear, Zaynie," she confessed through her tears, her hands grasping his arm. They didn't come back for the rest of the meeting, just sat there, holding eachother on the floor.

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

The video Liam put on was about a girl who was bullied at school and her dad was an alcoholic and her mom never paid any attention from her. And one day the girl snaps and kills herself. The video than shows after how sad the family is and how bad the bullies feel after. 

"This is so fucking stupid," Louis whispered to Harry, but his eyes softened when he saw Harry was crying. 

"Why you crying, baby?" Louis asked and turned around to straddle him, wiping the tears off his cheeks, harry softly smiled. 

"I cant help but remrmber when i drank bleach.. how my family had felt." harry croaked out, Louis felt a lump grow in her throat.

Louis shot him a look of sympathy, "baby we're over this come on, what's done is done and all that matters now is you're getting better, right?" Louis asked, harry reluctantly nodded.

"Right."/p>

The room was still dark as the video was still playing, they softly kissed, not going that passionate in fear of Harry sporting a boner. They pulled apart and just smiled at eachother. 

"I love you, my baby." Harry whispered, "I love you too." Louis whispered back. 

The lights came back on as the video ended, "we'll go around the circle and see how everyone felt, Louis, how did that make you feel?" Liam asked.

"Angry. She had a shitty life and when she ended it that's when all the people around her who were shitty realized they were shitty and we're upset she killed herself, it shouldn't have taken her suicide for them to realize how awful they were to her," Louis ranted angrily, Liam nodded slowly in understanding, "harry? How'd that make you feel?" 

"Sad." Harry said simply, he never was one to share his feelings,  "can you explain that?" Liam asked slowly as if he was talking to a child, harry shook his head.

Liam continued to go around the circle and ask how people feel, until the lunch bell rang and patients were literally running to the door. No one liked group therapy. 

"Louis?" Liam called out as her and Harry raced to the door, Louis turned around and gave him an impatient look. 

"Can we talk?" Louis looked over to Harry who shrugged, she sighed and made her way back to Liam who smiled warmly at her. Harry reassuringly rubbed circles on her thumb.

Louis took stood next to Liam, "what do we need to talk about?" 

Liam cleared his throat, "Just wanted to check up on you, make sure everything's going okay." 

"Everything's going great Li, got my Harry and he makes me happier than I ever thought I could be," Louis replied dreamily, Liam and Harry both smiled widely at that. 

"Great! Just what I like to hear, I hate to make you feel uncomfortable but have you hurt yourself at all recently, Louis? " Harry gave Louis an almost angry look as Louis looked embarrassingly at the ground.

Louis shifted uncomfortably on her feet, she shook her head but didn't make eye contact. Liam sighed and grabbed Louis's left wrist, she almost tried to fight against him but one sharp look from Harry and she let her arm limp. 

Louis looked away as Liam lifted up his sleeve, Liam sighed in dissapointment and Harry let out a shaky breath. 

"Louis.. I thought you were getting better." 

Louis didn't say anything, just took her wrist back and pulled his sleeve back up. 

"Wait here," an tense silence fell over the couple as they watched Liams retreating body. It was almost a relied when Liam came back. Almost. 

Liam came back with a short sleeve shirt and Louis gasped in horror,  "liam please don't," 

Liam shook his head, "Put on the shirt Louis," 

"Listen to him." Harry chimed in roughly.

Louis sobbed in her hands as she took off her shirt, standing in front of Liam and her boyfriend in only her bra. Faded scars covered her ribs, Louis put on the shirt and crossed her arms immediately, the white shirt making her cuts stand out. 

She left the room angrily, harry huffing as he followed after her. Louis slammed the door behind her and slid down the wall, her body shaking with sobs. No one else in this hospital knew why she was here and now it was going to be balantly obvious why she's in the loony bin. Harry opened the door, his face tense, but softened when he took in his crying girlfriend. He ignored the voice in his head saying to just ignore her and instead sat next to her, gently shushing her and weaving his fingers throughout her hair. Harry bit his lip, "you're so sad baby, breaks my heart... my beautiful girl is so broken." He rubbed his scars as he spoke softly, Louis cried harder at that. Harry grasped her chin and stared into her glassy blue eyes, he nuzzled their noses together, unintentially warming Louis's heart. She couldn't resist leaning in and passionately kissing him. Harry breathed out of his nose roughly at the intensity of the kiss. He quickly stood and louis wrapped hwe logs around his waist. Harry thanked god they were placed so close to the group therapy room and rushed to their shared rooM. 

(They were only able to share the room when Harry threatened to try to mkill himself again if they weren't roomed together) 

Harry laid Louis onto the bed and softly kissed her, only disconnecting their lips when he slowly took off Louis's shirt. Louis self consciously wrapped her arms around her stomach, harry looked down at her sadly as he removed her arms and leant down to gently kiss all over her stomach. 

"You're beautiful everywhere, even the parts you hate most." Harry said in between kisses, Louis smiled despite the tears falling down her cheeks. 

Harrys thick lips traveled upwards and kissed along Louis's ribs, his thumb rubbing at the old scars. He couldn't help himself when he groped Louis's breasts, the large mounds of flesh filling his hands. Her thighs tightened around his waist. He moved a bit further up her body, her bright blue eyes stared into his. He smirked and slipped his hands into her bra, brushing his thumb over her nipple. She let out a breathy moan. 

"You're beautiful," 

She smiled shyly, grabbing Harry by his cheeks and pulling him up to kiss her. Her eyes fluttered shut as he moved his mouth expertly against hers, she clamped her thighs together as he slipped his tongue in her mouth. She moaned in surprise when he sat up and spread her thighs with his knees, their mouths still connected. 

Harry cheekily ran his fingers along the inside of Louis's thigh, her thighs tried to close but his knees securely held them open. He pulled away in the kiss, Louis was breathing heavy and her eyes widened as Harry sucked on two of his fingers, winking at her cheekily before kissing her again. He pulled her underwear down slightly as he rubbed his wet fingers against her clit. She struggled to kiss him as passionately back as her body hummed in pleasure, her eyes popped opened when he slipped a finger inside her, pumping in and out.

Her hips stuttered, "Holy shit," she moaned, harry smirked at her bliss ed out face and wiggled back down to in between her thighs, he held onto her hips as he licked his lips at how wet he made his girl. 

Louis's legs clamped around his head as he tongued at her clit, his hand that wasn't fingering her he placed on her mouth, Louis tended to scream when she orgasmed. 

Her hips bucked up as her orgasm was pulsing throughout her body, Harrys dark green eyes watched smugly as he watched her fall apart. Her hands fisted the covers.

"No one will ever see you like this except me, " harry possessively stated, "Come for me, my baby." 

Louis laid next to Harry as she came down for her high, "baby you need me to blow you?" 

Harry bit his lip in embarrassment, "I kind of.. came in my pants." 

Louis laughed lightly, "I knew you got off on pleasuring me but jesus babe, that good?" 

He pressed a kiss to her forehead, "pussy too bomb." 

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

 

"I can't fucking believe you!" Zayn bellowed, a vein bulging out of his neck. Perrie rolled her eyes from where she was lying on the bed. 

"Zayn, you're being ridiculous, I was asking him what time it was." Zayn laughed sarcastically at that. 

He angrily moved closer to where she was laying on the bed, "you fucking slut, you're lying to me!" 

Before Perrie could move Zayn pulled her off the bed by her ankles and onto the floor, "you always lie to me!" He yelled and kicked her hard in the ribs, Perrie gasped out in pain.

"Always fucking around with other guys!" He landed a solid kick to Perrie's head and she immediately fell unconscious. 

Zayn was about to kick her again when he saw her eyes were shut and blood was soaking her shirt where he was kicking.  He kneeled down beside her and frantically searched for her pulse. 

"Baby?!" Zayn screamed, his eyes widened in panic, "help! She's bleeding!" 

He yelled, immediately there was a nurse rushing into the room, she saw Perrie unconscious on the floor and Zayn looking guilty. She sighed and shook her head.

"Can you pick her up for me and take her down to medical?" The nurse asked, Zayn nodded and easily picked up Perrie, he didn't realize he was crying until a tear fell onto Perrie's cheek. He kissed her cheek and than ran her into medical. 

All the nurses rolled their eyes when they saw Zayn pounding on the door, he frequently visited medical. 

"Wish Perrie would just leave him," one of the nurses muttered as she opened the door, Zayns heavy breathing filled the room. 

"She's unconscious, and her side is bleeding!" He said frantically,  he placed her on the bed and took a seat in one of the waiting chairs and nervously watched them inspect her. 

"Alright Zayn, can you tell us what happened?"

Zayn bit his lip guiltily, "we-um- got in a fight and I, um-" Zayn awkwardly scratched his neck. 

"I kicked her in the ribs and on the head. Really hard," the nurses gave him dirty looks, the head nurse smacked her lips together. 

"Okay. Well you broke two of her ribs so we'll have to patch those up, and she's mildly unconscious but she'll wake up soon, she'll be a bit woozy the next couple days and might throw up but no permanent damage." 

Zayn let out a sigh of relief and kissed Perrie on her forehead, he moved his chair closer to her and clutched her hand. 

Her eyes started to flutter open, she started to panic when she saw Zayn, Zayn felt a lump grow in his throat as she began having a panic attack. 

"Breath baby, you're safe, calm down you're okay." He encouraged, he relaxed when her breathing slowed down.

"Zaynie you hurt me." Perrie cried, a tear fell down Zayns cheek and he couldn't help himself when he climbed onto the hospital bed and spooned her from behind. 

"I know, I'm sorry baby doll. I hate that I keep hurting you. " He admitted, Perrie cried into her hands. 

"You hurt me so bad," 

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

 

Perrie woke up vomiting all over herself and Zayn, her eyes widened when she realized what she had unintentially done. She silently crept out of bed and wet a towel in the bathroom and tries to clean Zayn off without him waking up. 

Her anxiety was spiked and she couldn't help herself when she found herself sitting on the edge of the bath tub and a razor pressed to her hip. She felt much more relaxed when she watched the blood bead out of the cuts. She startled when there was a knock on the door.

"Baby, did you throw up on me?" Zayn asked, teasing in his tone. Perrie let out a breath of relief when she realized he wasn't angry. 

"Sorry Zaynie, I'm feeling a bit woozy." She said as she rushed to clean up the blood and hide the razor. She opened the bathroom door and Zayn smiled down at her, his eyes sparkling.

He tucked a piece of her long hair behind her ear, "you feeling okay, babe?" 

Perrie nodded, a slight blush covering her cheeks, "I feel better now that I've thrown up." 

Zayn laughed lightly at that and kissed her lightly on the forehead, "my beautiful girl." 

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

"Good morning everyone!" Liam greeted with a big smile, he got a couple good mornings back. 

"Alright, today we're going to go around- hey! Louis and Harry stop canoodooling!" 

Louis and Harry pulled away from eachother, a long of spit disconnecting with them, Louis giggled. 

"Sorry Liam!" Liam let out an exasperated groan but continued. 

"We're going to go around the circle and say how we're feeling out of ten. Starting with Perrie, " liam said and turned to Perrie who was sitting beside him.

Perrie nervously figetted under his gaze, "8" 

She almost always said 8, it's a safe number. 

"Zayn, how are you feeling out of ten?" 

Zayn rubbed Perrie's knuckles with his thumb, "8." 

"Alright, denny how are- Perrie what is that?" 

Perrie looked at Liam in panic, she knew she had cut too high, Liam reached over and pulled down the waist of her pants, revealing several cuts on her hip.

She hesitantly looked up at Zayn who was nearly seething, his grip was tight on her hand. 

"Are. You. Fucking. Kidding. Me!" Zayn screamed and jumped out of his chair, forcefully pushing Perrie out of her seat. She cried out as her ribs ached. She stood up quickly off the floor and ran. Zayn was quick on her heels. 

She sprinted into their room and locked herself in the bathroom, Zayn pounded on the door.

"Get out of there right now you stupid bitch! If you do anything stupid in there we're fucking over!" Zayn screamed through the door, Perrie was freaking out. She grabbed the razor she hid under the carpet, she cut her wrist but it wasn't enough. 

"Open the fucking door!" 

"Zayn," Perrie whispered.

"What?!" 

"I love you.." 

Perrie cried out and cut from her wrist all the way up her arm, she screamed at the excruciating pain. Her arm throbbed as blood poured out of the large cut.

Suddenly the door broke open and Zayn could hardly believe his eyes as nurses carried out a limp Perrie, he nearly threw up when he saw the long cut down her wrist. He couldn't help himself when he hit his head repeatedly on the bathroom as Perrie was pulled out of the tub. 

"Fuck!" He screamed.

"Fucking fuck!" 

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

 

Harry rubbed Zayns back as he attempted to comfort him but he knew there was nothing he could do to help him. The person he loved most tried to kill herself due to how he was treating her. Harry would never be able to live with himself if he ever hurt Louis so bad she felt the only way out was to kill herself. 

Zayn sobbed hysterically into Harrys t shirt, "I hate myself, she tried to kill herself because of me. I make her so unhappy and scared she attempted suicide." 

He let out a strangled cry as reality started to sink in, "stupid, stupid, stupid." 

 

Zayn immediately stood up when the doctor came out of Perrie's room, "is she.. alive?" 

The doctor nodded, a slight smile on his face, harry and Louis shot eachother relieved smiles. Zayn felt like a ton of bricks were taken off his shoulders, his girl was still alive. 

"Now," the doctor cleared his throat, "we have some concerns, there are multiple bruises covering her body and what seems to be self inflicted scars. But from what I understand she is receiving therapy for that?" 

All three boys nodded, the doctor slightly smiled, "you three can make your way in."

Louis and Harry stood back as Zayn rushed in, Zayn could hardly wait another minute of not seeing his baby girl. Her eyes widened in fear when she saw him but he ignored it and kissed all over her face.

"Don't leave me," he cried, continuing to kiss all over her face. 

"Than you need to stop hurting me," she said quietly back. 

Zayn climbed onto the bed and spooned her from the back,  he whispered in her ear how much he loved her and how he's finally going to treat her the way she deserves.

Things were looking up for them. 

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

It's been three days now since Perrie had attempted suicide and to Harrys distress it had seemed to really trigger something within Louis. Harry couldn't help but become concerned and often acting out due to the multiple cuts appearing on Louis's wrist.

Louis dodged Harrys arm trying to grab his wrist to inspect the quite deep cut that seemed as if Louis had done it hours previous. 

"Babe. Seriously fuck off. It's my body I can do what I want with it," Louis snarled, harry gawked at him. 

"You cannot seriously think this is okay, you're fucking mutilating your body. You are taking a fucking razor," harry pointed at his wrist, "and cutting yourself to watch yourself bleed, leaving scars that'll never heal. That's fucked up," louis shot up at that.

"Oh yeah? You know what's even more fucked up?" Louis moved closer to Harry so they were practically chest to chest, Louis angrily looked up at him.

"Claiming to love life and than turning around and chugging a bottle of bleach." 

Harry flinched from the harshness of his words, he blinked back the tears.

"You can't possibly be turning this around on me," 

Louis shrugged with a smirk, "if what I'm doing is fucked up, than you're as fucked up as me." 

"That's enough!" They both jumped as a furious Liam made their way to them, he pointed angrily at his office.

"My office. Now." 

                         ************

 

Liam folded his hands on his desk and looked dissaprovongly at the so called doting couple. Louis shrank under his gaze and Harry merely ignored it. 

"That was a pretty explosive fight I just witnessed." Liam observed, harry nor louis showed any reaction. Liam sighed. 

"Louis, why don't we start with you, why are you upset?" 

Louis crossed her arms, suddenly feeling like her cuts were all you could see, "he can't tell me what to do with my body."

Harry gave him an exasperated look, "are yo-" 

"Shh! Louis is giving us her side, whether you disagree with it or not, continue Louis." 

"I just don't understand what's the big problem of me cutting myself? It how I release stress, wind down after a long day. I look forward to it like how you look forward to a hot bath after work. People are addicted to cigarettes which kill you but aren't put in mental institutions, I cut myself every once and a while and I'm a freak. I just don't get it," Louis ranted, harry closed his eyes tightly in annoyance.

Liam nodded slowly, "harry your turn." 

"You wanna know what the problem is with you hurting yourself?" Louis uneasily looked at the ground, "I love you, I love you so fucking much. Thinking of you hurt makes my heart hurt, as corny as that sounds. Knowing you are intentionally hurting yourself for some sort of release kills me," harry deeply sighed and Louis looked close to tears, "I just hate to see you hurt." 

Louis let out a choked sob, "I d-didnt know you f-felt that way." 

Harry smiled sadly, "of course I feel that way, my baby. I care for you so deeply the ocean is jealous of our love."

Louis teasingly punched Harrys shoulder, a tear streaming down her cheek.

"You're such a goof."  
"Your goof." 

                       ***********

It's three months later and not to much has changed with Harry and Louis, harry is getting close to being discharged but Louis still is self harming, although it has toned down. 

Zayn and Perrie have taken a complete turn for the better, it seemed Zayn just needed that one push to finally treat Perrie the way she deserved to be. They are getting released shortly as well, sometimes people need to look into the eyes of death to realize what's really important


	2. Authors note

I'm really upset as to why this fic hasn't gotten more views because I thought I did well on it but that seems to not be the case.. I'm going to keep going through and editing and hoping to improve to get at least one frigging kudo. Comments of criticism are greatly appreciated thank you♡

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoyed that it was hard for me to write it! Please comment what you thought! Really appreciate it


End file.
